When a colleague humiliates, degrades, offends or intimidates you as a result of repeated, unreasonable or inappropriate workplace practice then you are being bullied.

Bullying behaviour can range from very obvious verbal or physical assault – to very subtle psychological abuse  including yelling, isolating/excluding employees, psychological harassment, withholding info vital for work efficiency, deliberately changing work agreement to inconvenience employees and giving employees meaningless or  impossible tasks. It is not uncommon for bullies to use their power, status, skills or position in the workplace and anyone can be targets for this malpractice.

What’s the urgency for this blog? Because although we have progressed from the Middle Ages, bullying still exists and exposure to this situation is much easier in this current economic condition.

Management think they have the advantage as employees can be defensive, cautious and paranoid as staffs are put through the chopping block. Now how do we protect ourselves from these?

Make sure you take down notes – remember the time, date, situation, specific examples and what was said. It is best that you have written communication or witnesses at all times. It’s good to trust but it would make it less complicated if you look after yourself first; do not compromise your position by allowing verbal agreements. Talk to someone you can trust outside work.

Now, it is best to try and settle this between you and the offender. When you request to meet, make sure you have a written request for the meeting which should include the agenda.

You have to make sure that your issues are valid and you can provide example/s or evidence regarding your case. From the outset, your subject should be about their behaviour and I will explain this later.

Again, make sure you are taking notes and depending on how hostile the other party can be, you can inform the offender that you wish to get a witness on your second meeting. If you cannot progress after 2 attempts and you think your job will be compromised, do not hesitate to go to your MOR (Manager One Removed). First meeting can just be you and the MOR, but the minute you suspect that you are not progressing or your MOR is taking sides in spite of all your evidence, then it is time you get a witness to record everything.

The reason why you need to do this is there is a possibility that the situation can be turned around and make it look like you are the issue. If you start talking to your boss or colleagues about their issue then you cannot substantiate or you hesitate to file a formal complain, the other party can make your working life harder for you.

So if you choose to talk to HR or join a Union, be clear of what you want to achieve. If they are witnessing a discussion, before they leave, go through the discussion so both parties will have the same notes and there is no gap when your representative moves onto another role. If you wish, you can both sign and get copies of the record of discussion. Always keep copies of e-mails. If you feel that you are not properly represented in the first 2 meetings, you have the right to request for another representative. You have the right to protect yourself. Most of all, you have the right to a fair system.

At the end of the day, the union, your colleague/s or company can’t help you if you don’t have witnesses, diary notes and/or did not follow the procedure. Use your mind not your emotions; sometimes you cannot trust or rely on anyone but yourself.

*** Bless Salonga is a creative writer whose passion includes business management & coaching, choreography and music.

Other post/s by Bless Salonga

• Calling Australia home is more than words - January 26th, 2012
• Education starts with DO-RE-ME - January 17th, 2012
• Chained by Fate - November 27th, 2011
• Isang Hibla - July 25th, 2011
• Independence is about accountability - June 22nd, 2011